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Mrs. Parliament’s Night Out – Neptune Theatre

31 Jan

We had the pleasure of checking out Norm Fosters latest production “Mrs. Parliament’s Night Out” at Neptune Theatre. Not knowing too much about the play we went with no expectations what so ever, but figured at the very least that Sheila McCarthy (from Little Mosque on the Prairie) would be somewhat entertaining.

In case you, like us knew nothing of the play before reading this – here is the synopsis:

When Teresa’s husband forgets their 32nd wedding anniversary she realizes it’s time to stop waiting for her husband’s attention and put herself first.

Will her husband notice the new Teresa? Will he care? This new comedy from Norm Foster asks what it takes to keep a marriage fresh – and questions if it’s even possible. Starring TV’s Sheila McCarthy.

The first thing we noticed was the set. It was modern and retro at the same time and was made up of several moving screens and white frames that were lit up with all different colours. Each scene was set by rolling one focal piece of the scene (grocery store checkout, watch case, restaurant tables) and you were left to fill in the blanks about everything else.

The cast was fantastic. Each person in the play with the exception of Mrs. Parliament took on a variety of characters which were so well played that you forgot you were watching the same people over and over again. Their comedy was natural and the roles fit each one to a tee.

My personal favourite was her grumpy old neighbour who spoke exactly like my favourite Great Uncle Teddy. Sarcastic and sour but at the same time ridiculously endearing.

Sheila McCarthy was the true show stealer. Her innocence as a housewife in a small town was so charming, but her quest to find true happiness was even more so. This naivety paired with the eccentric characters she encounters on her journey have you buckled over with laughter more often than not.

So if you’re looking for a good laugh, and some great live theatre we highly recommend checking this one out!

Mrs. Parliament’s Night Out runs at Neptune Theatre until February 19th, 2012.

Celebrity Doppelgangers – Animal Edition

9 Jan

Since our initial post regarding Celebrity Doppelgangers, many readers have let us know who else they feel looks oddly alike in Hollywood. Most impressive was a friend’s insight into the world of celebrity animals. I’m not talking Paris Hilton’s dog looks like Kiki Palmer’s dog – I’m talking dogs who are famous who look like other dogs who are famous.

Let’s start in Golden Retriever Land. The dog who played “Comet” in Full House went by the name of “Buddy the Dog” – clever, I know. After wrapping up his final season on Full House he went on to play Air Bud in the first two Air Bud movies. Sadly, Buddy the Dog passed away shortly after the second film – which left producers no choice but to replace him with none other than his celebrity doppelganger, strangely named Air Bud.

This child and dog combo has earned an insanely large chunk of change over the years.

Air Bud plays rugby. That's a fact.

Next we will move into the world of little dogs. In 1995 the world welcomed the kids’ TV series “Wishbone” into their homes. Wishbone’s IMDB description is far better than anything I could write or think of so I have chosen to borrow it instead.

Soccer (May 171988 – June 262001) was a Jack Russell terrier dog actor. A veteran of many television commercials for companies like Nike Athletics and Mighty Dog Dog Food, he became famous portraying the talking dog Wishbone in the PBS TV series of the same name. Chosen from out of more than 100 dogs who auditioned for the role, Soccer appeared in almost every episode of the show during its 19951998 run. He lived with his trainer, Jackie Kaptan, on the Plano, Texas ranch where the Wishbone series was filmed.

Whoa whoa. WHAT?! Over 100 other dogs AUDITIONED for the role of Wishbone and this little guy was the most impressive? How could you even decide?! If I were in grade 9 and I could job shadow anyone for bring your daughter to work day, I would track down the casting director for animal-based TV shows and movies and demand that they let me watch them shatter the dreams of puppies everywhere just so they can make a buck. I’m sure I would just cry all day but I’d like to see what kind of person has that job. I’m guessing a mean one that hates puppies.

I digress. Wishbones casting director obviously knew that “Soccer” the Jack Russell would be a hit, and sure enough another little Jack Russell popped onto the silver screen in 1996. The TV show Frasier introduced canine friend “Eddie” in the shows 3rd season. Eddie is actually “Enzo” the dog whose father “Moose” was also in the biz.

Stealing milk bones from the rich and giving to the poor.

Enzo, you adorable little cash cow you.

Enzo’s IMDB profile trumps Soccer’s hugely and poor little Soccer never made it onto the big screen. Was it stage fright? Or was it that no one could tell the difference between the two? We will never know.

New Year’s Twitsolutions

3 Jan

New Year’s resolutions are a nice idea… eat better, work out more, stick to a budget, save the world… all good things to do. I haven’t really settled on a real life resolution yet, so in the meantime I’m making some Twitter-related resolutions. So here are the improvements I’m working on in 2012.

5. Find out what a “MT” is. It took me a while to figure out RT. This will take some investigative work.

4. Report spammers. Often. When your picture is of a celebrity and your Twitter name ends in a series of numbers, I’m on to you!

Oh really IsaacBritsch454? You may look like Dr. House, but I never tweeted such a thing. Leave my name out of your faux retweets!

3. More pictures. People like pictures. What kind of pictures will I post? I can’t say for sure yet. I don’t have a pet or a baby or anything cool like that, so I’ll work on finding some great subject matter. Suggestions welcome.

I'm not very influential about the New York Jets. But influential, nontheless.

2. Not feel so distressed when my Klout has dropped dramatically. On one hand, Klout is kind of fun. Yet somehow I find my mood can be altered by a massive drop in my Klout score.  Why oh why does this arbitrary online rating get under my skin so? I have no idea – especially given the fact that it appears to be completely baseless. Klout, how did you deduce that I am an expert on the New York Jets? I cannot currently, nor could I ever, name  a singular player on that team. Where are you getting your information?! So I’m done with you. (I mean, I’ll still sign in… sporadically… and feel good when my score goes up.) But I’m done worrying about it.

Kelly Oxford is a great tweeter. I anticipate that with my new and improved tweets, I'll soon have 275,000+ followers too.

1. Try to tweet mainly funny/interesting/useful things. I know that what’s funny to me may not be funny to you. I also know that boring, banal tweets sometimes just make their way into the daily rotation. But given that I greatly appreciate a hilarious tweet or a link to something cool, I will try to be a model tweeter (not to be confused with a model who tweets – that’s a resolution for 2013).

Wednesday Weeping – How Crappy Customer Service Might Ruin Christmas

21 Dec

I love bargains. Love ’em. Live for ’em. Won’t buy a thing full-price. I have purchased deals from Groupon, TeamBuy, DealFind, etc. and experienced minimal problems. Ergo, when TeamBuy had a great Holiday deal on Android tablets, I thought “what a great idea for a Christmas present.” I know the ipad is the ultimate in tableture, but at a bargain price, I figured why not try out the Android, and then take it from there.

The site stated that all orders had to be placed before December 9th if you wanted them to arrive before Christmas. Using my TeamBuy certificate, I placed my order with CoolDroids on December 7th. Then I checked my account. I checked it every day. On Monday the 19th of December, my account still said “Awaiting Fulfillment”. This did not bode well for the timely delivery of Christmas gifts, considering the CoolDroids website says it will take 7-10 business days to arrive once an order is shipped.

I called CoolDroids. I pressed 2 for “Support”. I was told “This is not a viable option”. I could feel my chest tightening. Had I been scammed?

I called TeamBuy. I spoke to a nice-enough guy, who assured me that all orders placed in time would be delivered by the 23rd. I asked if there was a phone number where I could speak directly with someone at CoolDroids. He said no.

I checked the “Q&A” section of the TeamBuy website. Hundreds of people were on there voicing the same concern as me. (Scroll to the bottom of the thread for the really angry posts). We had all placed our orders on time. We had all tried to contact CoolDroids, and TeamBuy, and anyone who might be able to answer the question “WILL I GET MY DELIVERY IN TIME FOR CHRISTMAS?!”. We were all given the run-around.

I went to the CoolDroids website and waited for an “online operator”. I started chatting with “Geraldine”. I’m 99% sure that Geraldine is a chat robot. Here is the transcript of our conversation. (You probably have to open this image in another window and enlarge to see the text of the chat). Basically, the response was “yeah… we’ll get back to you on that.”

My chat with "Geraldine" - and my internal monologue.

Anyway, it’s been 48 hours. No reply from Geraldine. No communication from TeamBuy, so I tweeted at them. And they tweeted me back. TeamBuyHalifax was on it immediately (thank you for that), and TeamBuy_Toronto (where the head office is located) responded within 24 hours. Their customer experience team is working on it.

Fair enough. But why hasn’t anyone been on this TeamBuy thread where so many of TeamBuy’s customers are upset about having no effin’ clue what’s going on with their Christmas presents? Some of the complaints came from parents voicing concern over the fact that these were gifts for their kids. How do you explain that one on Christmas morning? “Sorry kids, Santa won’t be showing up with your presents for a few more weeks, or possibly not at all.” It may be out of your hands TeamBuy, in fact, I’m quite sure at this point it is – but people bought the deal from you, and they want answers to their questions.

Not everyone uses Twitter, and I was getting frustrated with TeamBuy’s lack of activity on  their own forum. Anyone in any kind of social business will tell you that it is part of someone’s job (if not everyone’s job) to engage with customers over issues of this nature. Why wasn’t anyone doing it?

I know that small companies sometimes get overwhelmed by immense TeamBuy/Groupon/DealFind responses and that can slow things down and screw up business for them. However, CoolDroids also placed similar ads on other group-buying sites, so one would have to imagine that they were looking for a surge in orders.  If you guarantee that something will be delivered by Christmas, you better be ready to follow through with the customers who placed their order weeks and weeks ago when their order status says “Awaiting Fulfillment” only a few days before Christmas. When things are going poorly and orders aren’t making it out the door – you get EVERYONE on the phone and on email and on your support forums and you DEAL WITH YOUR CUSTOMERS. Don’t leave this task to Geraldine the Robot. If you do you, then please be ready for a crap-ton of reports to the Better Business Bureau.

If all of this wasn’t enough, it appears that is actually a re-seller/alias for another site – CoolDroids/Kascadian seem to be the exact same site, but with different names. One thing that leaps off the page is that the prices at Kascadian are cheaper, with the exact same tablet retailing for $94.99 instead of the $389.99 (discounted to $119 + $16 tax). Either way, it still looks like the TeamBuy purchasers are paying more than what the tablet is worth. What the hell is going on here?

CoolDroids... Kascadian... it's all the same, and it's all bullshit

Teambuy – I’m sure you didn’t want this. Did you research this company particularly well before signing them up? Probably not. Did you notice that Kascadian Electronics has an “F” rating from the BBB? Probably not.  But I’m sure you didn’t want this. Ideally, the orders would be shipped, we would all have our tracking numbers, and everything would be right in the world and your customers would be happy. But that’s not what happened, and by abandoning your message boards and not addressing the 2000+ customers who purchased this deal, you aren’t doing very much to instill faith in your brand.

So that’s where we are right now. As it stands, my order says “Partially Shipped”. I don’t know what that means and I have  not received a tracking number from CoolDroids, or Kascadian, or anyone. If my order does arrive in time to make it under the tree, I will chalk it up to being a Christmas miracle, but I’m not holding my breath. Next time I’ll know that when buying any physical product from a group buying site… buyer beware!

Christopher Hitchens – 1949-2011. Thoughts on my hero and inspiration.

16 Dec

A memorial, by Joel Kelly

Today will be filled with memorials of Hitch, and likely more than a few cheers that the strongest opponent of religious tyranny has finally quit the fight.

My memorial offers little to this conversation, I know, but if Hitch inspires us to do anything, it is to write.

I’d like to think Hitch had a more profound effect on my life than most. When I first discovered him (YouTube videos of his debates and Hitchslaps, actually) I had recently left a cult.

I was young, and had been convinced since childhood that I knew the “truth”. That I was a part of it. I questioned this, and had begun to see less and less truth and more and more control and insecure intellectual bullying, but I was still stuck, somewhat.

I was still stuck going through the motions of life, anchored by teachings that I didn’t truly believe anymore, but could not see a path away from.

And then, Hitch.

Christopher Eric Hitchens, the Oxford-educated journalist, debater, and most of all fierce intellectual, passed away yesterday from the pneumonia caused by his stage-4 esophageal cancer (he would remind us, “there is no stage 5”) and treatment.

But not before changing the lives of people like me, all around the world.

Hitch’s debates (and then his books and articles in Slate and Vanity Fair) showed me the alternatives to the wicked preachments of religion, and the tyranny they enforce and stem from. He was a champion of, as he said, “taking the risk all the time” that one doesn’t know enough yet, that one can always be learning, reading, and struggling for truth.

What a thing to say, and shouldn’t it be obvious? But clearly, in a world where people can still be beheaded for “witchcraft” or politicians can be openly bigoted, or, frankly, that there can still be arguments over which human beings deserve more rights than others, this fight must still go on.

Christopher always insisted, to anyone who would credit him for motivating them to make their break from religion, that they would have gotten there on their own eventually. In my case, certainly that’s true. But I don’t know how long it would have taken, how many more years I would have wasted.

Christopher (never “Chris”) leaves this world better than the one he’d been born into. From his books exposing the bubble reputations of Henry Kissinger, Mother Teresa, and Bill Clinton, to his debates against the religious, to being an experimental case for cutting edge cancer treatment, he has contributed more to the world than most could ever dream of.

In his Vanity Fair article Tumortown, he notes: “‘Until you have done something for humanity,’ wrote the great American educator Horace Mann, ‘you should be ashamed to die.'”

Christopher Eric Hitchens, my hero, my constant inspiration, and one of the best human beings to live on this planet, had no reason to be ashamed to die.

Goodbye, Hitch.

And thank you.

Here is my favorite  video of Christopher: his closing debate remarks, to what had started as a hostile student crowd, while he was suffering from cancer:

Celebrities with Celebrity Doppelgangers

6 Dec

It must be hard to be a celebrity. What with all the attention and fortune and whatnot. But it must be even harder to be a celebrity with a celebrity doppelganger.

For years I have struggled with distinguishing a few sets of stars. Let’s start with the first.

Keira Knightly & Natalie Portman 

Yes, I know they are not the same people BUT they do look shockingly alike. Can you imagine auditioning for a role and knowing you were up against each other? It is one thing if you’re Natalie Portman and you lose a role to January Jones. Clearly they were not looking for what you had to offer. But if Keira snakes a role out from under you? Well I would have to think you’d be pretty ticked.

Next up and the duo that really gets my head spinning: Christopher Walken & Jon Voigt

I’m not entirely convinced that these two aren’t the same people. Have you ever seen them together? Have you ever seen Walken look really mad? Or Voigt extremely hilarious? No. I stand by my theory that they are just alter egos of each other.

And now, for some more obscure but equally convincing doubles…

Salim (Madhur Mittal from Slumdog Millionaire) & Bruno Mars

I’ve been ruminating over this one for a while. Slumdog Millionaire came out before Bruno Mars was a big success. When I first saw Bruno popping up places, my initial reaction was “hey, the mean and then self-sacrificing brother from Slumdog Millionaire is a singer now.” Turns out that he’s not. But that doesn’t make them look any less similar.

Jason Trawick (aka Britney’s man) & Sam Tramell

God these 2 are alike. Shaggy hair? Check. Manicured stubble? Check. Affinity for plaid shirts? You know it. These scruff muffins also clean up really nicely too. It must be a relief for Britney to know that if she continues to go through men like she goes through money, that at least she has a pretty bang-on stand in. (PS – I love you Britney).

So what do you think? Any celeb doubles that really throw you for a loop?

Weeping Wednesday – Michael Jordan Edition

30 Nov

Growing up my dear friend Tara always wanted a puppy. Did it matter that she was allergic to pretty much every animal under the sun and slept with an epipen under her pillow? No it did not. Tara begged for a puppy day after day, year after year but alas, no puppy.

After an impressive report card season in Grade 8, Tara thought that perhaps now was the time that she would be rewarded for her efforts, and with what? A puppy of course. So each day Tara burst through the door of her home hoping that there would be her new best friend, and day after day she was let down. Fridays were especially  difficult because she assumed that if she were to get a puppy it would likely come on a Friday to ensure she had the weekend to bond with her new pet.

One Friday Tara walked into her home with baited breath only to find her mom and sister waiting for her. They asked Tara to come upstairs because they had a surprise for her. This was it!! The puppy was upstairs in her room!!

As Tara rounded the corner her heart sank as she saw what was waiting for her. No, it was not a puppy, not even close. Instead she was greeted with a life sized cut out of Michael Jordan. 100% hypoallergenic. To this day our poor Tara has never had a puppy. She does have a sick slam dunk though.

The Jungle Book at Neptune Theatre is a visual stunner

28 Nov

I love musicals. I really, truly, deeply and sincerely love them. I sing ‘Seasons of Love’ (from RENT) in the shower, I listen to ‘You Can’t Stop the Beat’ (from Hairspray) on the treadmill, I belt out a good rendition of ‘Memories (from Cats) on lazy Sunday afternoons… ok maybe that last one is a lie, but you get my drift. Musicals + me = highly compatible. Therefore, I was excited to check out Neptune Theatre’s production of the Jungle Book.

Based on Rudyard Kipling’s novel of the same name, The Jungle Book features music and lyrics by Eric Hughes. For those unfamiliar,  the play follows the story of Mowgli, a boy raised in the jungles of India by a wolf pack.

Shere Kahn wants to take a bite of Mowgli

To avoid any confusion, I should clarify that this is NOT the Disney version of the Jungle Book and you will not be hearing “The Bare Necessities”. While the characters and the story are more or less the same, this Jungle Book is much darker than the one you might be used to. There are moments of silliness (largely provided by the monkeys) that are perfectly suited for young viewers, but there is also some pretty heavy subject matter that may not be  appropriate for all ages. (Example: At one point the villagers hatch a plan to trap Mowgli’s human mother in her house and burn it down.)  I don’t know how much of this content kids will actually take in and understand. It’s very possible/probable that anyone under the age of 10 will be focusing on the animal costumes and impressive set, but just as a warning – there is some material in the Jungle Book that kids might find frightening. That being said,  it is an entertaining show, and I remain ever-grateful that there is a place like Neptune in Halifax where we can see productions of this caliber.

The monkeys kidnap Mowgli. Kid can't catch a break.

So here’s what was really great about the Jungle Book: The monkeys kidnap Mowgli. Kid can’t catch a break.

– Baloo the Bear – this is a part designed to be a crowd-favorite, and it certainly was. The actor who played this role – Sheldon Bergstrom – had a great voice and did a great job. Also, he REALLY reminded me of Cameron from Modern Family. So I liked that.

– The dancing – I love me a good dance routine. There were some great dance breaks, including one that involved fire. What’s not to like about fire dancing?

– The monkey rap – late in the 1st act, the play suddenly shifts gears and the band of 4 monkeys do a full-blown rap number that involves the phrase ‘sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me’. It was very unexpected. I laughed.

– The set –  Neptune can really put together some extraordinary sets and do a lot on a fairly small stage. From deep in the jungle, to the monkey city, to the Indian village, there was no shortage of visual stimuli.

The Jungle Book runs at Neptune Theatre from Nov 22 – Jan 8. For information and tickets, check out the Neptune Theatre website or swing by the Neptune Box Office at 1593 Argyle Street.

Last-Minute Halloween Costume Ideas

31 Oct

Happy Halloween! If you’re like many of us, you haven’t put much thought into your costume this year. Now that October 31 is here, you’re scrambling but can’t bear the thought of venturing to one of those crazy Halloween stores or braving Value Village. Fear not, little ghouls and goblins! We have tons of costume ideas for you using everyday household items that can be thrown together in minutes.

This year there are lots of famous faces that can make quick and easy costumes. If you happen to be a female with long hair of the brown variety, Kate Middleton is as easy as it gets. Put on a tailored dress (and a trench coat if it’s chilly) and some ladylike pumps. Use a curling iron to add some waves to your hair. Voila! Bonus points if you have a Prince William lookalike to trail around with you.

The Man Vs. Food guy is another super easy costume. All you need is a huge plate of food – wings, pizza, nachos, whatever. Carry it around and shove handfuls of food into your face at frequent intervals. Occasionally groan. An added perk: you’ll be too full to eat the leftover candy at the end of the night.

If you’re a lady who happens to have leggings and booties in your closet, Kim Kardashian is an easy choice. You’ll want an obnoxiously large engagement ring but you can make your own with balled-up tin foil and a twist tie. Obviously this works better if you have long black hair, but if so, it’s a pretty simple look to pull together.

There are plenty of classic costume ideas that are quick, easy, and cheap:

Hobo: Wear a tuque and an old coat. Draw on a beard. You could also push a shopping cart around, but we recommend digging one out of a ravine that’s already been trashed rather than making off with a new one from Micmac Mall.

Cat: Black sweater, leggings, headband with construction paper ears, and eyeliner nose and whiskers.

Skeleton: Wear all black and apply masking tape “bones” to your body.

Most Extreme Elimination Challenge contestant: Shorts, t-shirt, bike helmet, knee pads/elbow pads.

Pig in a Blanket: Cut out a pig snout from an egg carton and draw two nostrils on it. Tie it around your face. Wrap up in a blanket.

50’s Couple: A suit and tie for him, a dress and apron for her. You can embellish it by carrying a rolling pin, cookbook, etc. I don’t know what 50’s men carried around. Booze? The newspaper?

YouTube sensations make great Halloween costumes (remember the Bed Intruder last year?) This year we have Rebecca Black! Program “Friday” into your cell phone. Set the alarm to go off at 10 minute intervals. Lip-sync poorly while trying to maintain a brave smile. Act confused when it’s time to get in the car to go anywhere (“which seat should I take?”) Done!

There are also some Halifax-centric costumes you could try. If you own a black hoodie and a baseball bat, you’re a swarmer. Or cut out a big oval shape out of cardboard and cover it in tin foil. You are the Oval! If you’re going out with friends, they can wear winter coats, mitts, hats, and carry skates. Easy group costumes FTW!

Now that your costume is ready to go, get out there and fill those pillowcases!

January Jones – I don’t care who the Daddy is. No wait, yes I do.

19 Oct

I love Mad Men. Love, love, love it. Ergo, I love celebrity gossip that relates to the cast of Mad Men. Sadly, most of them are relatively uncontroversial… most, but not the lovely January Jones. Much like her character, Betty Draper, January Jones (aka Cadence from American Pie 3) is prone to drama and sets tongues wagging.

January’s new baby, Xander Dane Jones, recently made his public debut. He as been a hot topic since early in January’s pregnancy because no one actually knows who the baby’s Daddy is. And she’s not talking – she left the father’s name blank on the birth certificate. Several names have been thrown around but no one can say for sure just who provided the other half of little Xander Dane’s DNA. Luckily for you, at, we are nothing if not Internet Super Sleuths. So here’s some investigative journalism at it’s finest.*

Here’s a recent pic of Xander with his Momma. Cute huh?

What a cute little nugget!

But who could the Daddy be? Here are the front-runners:

1) Ashton Kutcher – The internet has been buzzing with rumours that Ashton may be the Daddy (fueling the fire for the Ashton/Demi split). The two used to date when January got to Hollywood, so there’s a “history” there. I suppose it’s possible, given Ashton’s penchant for blonde women who are not his wife, but I don’t know… I think this one might be a stretch. Ashton is just so angular, and the baby – not so much.

2) James Marsden – Before Ashton’s name got thrown in the ring, people were pointing fingers at James Marsden, January’s co-star in the latest X-Men movie. It could  be an explanation for James and his wife filing for divorce, but it’s a tough call. Although… how many baby names start with the letter X? Perhaps this is an homage to the movie set on which little Xander’s parents had their first rendez-vous? If little baby X has both Jones and Marsden DNA, that’s not such a bad hand to be dealt in the genetics department.

3) Jason Sudeikis – Jason and January were actually a couple, and according to reports they split up in January (wow that’s a lot of capital Js in one line), so the timing could work given Xander’s mid-September birth. This looks like the safest bet to me, but when asked about January’s pregnancy in May, Jason seemed legitimately confused and stunned. However, we must take in to consideration that the man is a professional actor, and secret Daddy of a Hollywood baby may be the role of a lifetime for him.

4) Matt Vaughn – Who? I had to look this one up. Matt Vaughn was the director of X-Men. Apparently he and January had an irregularly close relationship. This is further complicated by the fact that Mr. Vaughn’s wife is in fact super model Claudia Schiffer (aka – the woman who was once brilliantly cast as a Claudia Schiffer look-alike in the movie Love Actually). I don’t see a major similarity between Matt and Baby Xander, other than their equally sparse manes, but Mr. Vaughn has vehemently denied that he is the father of the baby. He doth protest too much, methinks.

Will we ever find out who the daddy is? Part of me really admires January Jones for taking on a this huge challenge on her own and sticking to her guns, but a BIG part of my just wants to know! So what are you thoughts? Could one of these guys be Xander’s Daddy?

* For the purposes of this post, “investigative journalism” involves spending a lot of time reading gossip sites. You have your methods, we have ours.